In Which I Buy a Hot Tub, Eagerly Await Its Glorious Arrival. And The Universe Says Nah.

You might recall I set out to flip thousands of dollars worth of thrift store items on eBay. The goal: buy a bitchin’ hot tub. Well, I got bored. Antsy. ADHD. Then I got a bonus at work. My brain began searching for other income streams. When my grandmother died almost twenty years ago, she … More In Which I Buy a Hot Tub, Eagerly Await Its Glorious Arrival. And The Universe Says Nah.

A Story About My Wife Getting Accosted in the Dog Food Aisle

Last week, while grocery shopping, my wife was accosted by a Blue Buffalo representative in the dog food aisle. Maybe it was the long day, the first week of back to school, or that thin, surreal peace of after the kids finally go to sleep — but the story cracked me up. I begged her … More A Story About My Wife Getting Accosted in the Dog Food Aisle

List: What Comes With the Wendy’s $5 Biggie Bag?

Burger, fries, nuggets, feral cat Diet soda because you’re watching your figure, and there’s like eight thousand calories in a cat. You figure a pound of bone, six pounds of hanging weight, at around 1329 kcal per lb Just kidding, keeping the cat as a pet, his name is Mr. Snugglemuffins The echoing voices of … More List: What Comes With the Wendy’s $5 Biggie Bag?