The Glowing Jesus-Like Bask of Paw Patrol


If you don’t know what Paw Patrol is, it’s a show where the citizens apparently have no county government, so they are constantly relying on a pack of talking puppies to repair their failing infrastructure, such as when the municipal water tank fails or the traffic lights break.  It can be noted that the pups also do crazy stuff like save the basket of Easter eggs when an eagle flies off with it. That’s the episode we’re watching now.

If you still don’t get it, it basically combines DOGS and CARS, two words every toddler can say and point to. Add in a slew of advertising disguised as toys and apparel, and you have the perfect storm of young obsession. One day my son may just be blogging about his ironic nostalgia on The Surfing Pizza Junior Dot Com.

Tired of being a slave to the cruel whims of whenever Nickelodeon decides to air Paw Patrol (which is all of the time, but never at that moment when the parents desperately need thirteen minutes to make dinner without a toddler trying to scale the oven), I bought a season to stream off Amazon.

I put it on the wife’s credit card. Upon seeing $25 worth of Paw Patrol charged to her card, her reaction was not WTF why didn’t you put it on your card if you wanted to buy that for him? It was: DID YOU BUY HIM THE NEW SEASON? ARE YOU SURE HE HASN’T ALREADY SEEN ALL THOSE EPISODES?

What have we become?

4 thoughts on “The Glowing Jesus-Like Bask of Paw Patrol

  1. Pa Pa Pa Pa Pa Paw Patrol… My son watched this when he was younger. Now at 6 he doesn’t really watch anything, he’d rather play Minecraft and spend his life complaining when I tell him to get off it and go play outside. My daughter at 2.5 is a Play School junkie, but I could think of worse things for her to be addicted to.. Like The Wiggles.

  2. What, they can still do that whole “making a show to sell toys” bit? The 80’s were rife with quick cash in shows abandoned faster than you can say “toy sales are dropping”.

    Looking it up, it’s illegal to advertise directly to children under 12 in Quebec, Norway, and Sweden, but not of course in the USA… interesting.

    I wonder what children’s programming looks like there?

  3. My 2 1/2 year old is just Wiggles and Adventure Time. Which is good, because you cant find anything Wiggles and Adventure Time isn’t in the toddler section. Whereas Paw Patrol is just a money pit.

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