Every year I countdown the days to Halloween by posting each weekday in October. In previous years, I’ve stuck to reviewing the latest and greatest in Halloween novelties. I’m going to do the same thing this year, but I’m going to shake things up a bit by also focusing on our daily living. Fall isn’t just a season, and October isn’t just a month, and Halloween isn’t just a day. All of it, combined, is a way of living—a lifestyle. I want to spend the next four weeks documenting that. Basically, this blog is going to become my personal Halloween diary.
I might as well begin a few days early.
I’ve been in Halloween beast mode for at least the last two weeks, and it began when I bought seven boxes of Monster Cereal. Oh and believe me, I was being conservative in purchasing only seven boxes. The Monster Cereals are the classic trio comprised of FrankenBerry, BooBerry, and Count Chocula that come out each fall. But this year also marks the return of the original quintet, lost members Frute Brute and Yummy Mummy. And not only that, but Target is carrying an exclusive run of boxes with the retro-artwork. Initially, I imagined myself buying something like twenty boxes—some for saving forever, some for eating, and some for being completely insane.
Somehow I reeled it in and decided I didn’t need to hoard cereal boxes in the basement. And even though the wife and I are always pretending that we’re going start some healthy protein-shake breakfast plan, we’ve obviously derailed that one for another month, tearing through the Monster Cereals at an alarming rate.
It’s only September 25th. We’re on box four.
FrankenBerry, BooBerry, and Count Chocula are as good to me as they’ve always been. Frute Brute and Yummy Mummy are the revelations here. Having never had them, I was more excited at first about trying Yummy Mummy. It is after all, ORANGE CREAM FLAVORED cereal. And trust me, the glowing neon orange color of this stuff does not disappoint. The verdict: it’s good stuff. But people, Frute Brute is life-changing.
I love this stuff. It’s cherry-flavored—a strong, candied cherry flavor. It’s my favorite out of all them. It reminds me vaguely of the long-lost Nintendo cereal, which was a candied berry flavor. I don’t think I can bear the thought of it being a one-time-only return in 2013. I may just have to hoard those cereal boxes or else.
It should also be noted that Frute Brute was originally spelled properly with the word “fruit,” but they likely made the change so that today’s idiotic kids (or their parents) would not mistake this for having any actual fruit. Rest assure everyone, it’s filled with corn syrup and red dye and ADHD—the very definition of the word “frute.”
In other news, M&Ms came out with a new seasonal-flavor this year, Pumpkin Spice.
I don’t have a picture of them to show you, so here is the empty candy dish that once held them instead. They’re not anywhere near as amazing as they sound, but like all M&Ms, they’re subtly addictive. They get inside your head where you have a small handful and then can’t stop thinking about them until they’re all gone. They don’t taste as much like pumpkin though. They lean more toward the “spice” aspect. It’s a warm, holiday-feeling taste.
I also found out yesterday that McDonald’s has a new sweet potato pie for the fall.
I ran out to get them last night and they are delicious. They sort of taste like the pumpkin pies, and I’m not even entirely certain I didn’t get the pumpkin ones by mistake. I’ll have to try them again later in the season, purely for scientific reasons. I know what you’re thinking and it’s true. I have nothing that’s non-edible to live for anymore. Well, except for McDonald’s unconditional love. It says it right there on the box, “baked with love.”
The October lifestyle is about eating all of the pumpkin-flavored bullshits and life is good. So join me throughout the next month, where I’ll be posting every weekday, documenting everything from candy to dog costumes to football snacks to haunted houses.